How Life Is........and It Ain't Fair Or Nice---
Dammit, I just went from being on top of the world, to having my world fall in around me. This is truly a shocker. I thought this was an excellent job for me. I was sooooo happy to be working at this job. I thought the boss was cool and my co-worker was cool. Turns out the boss is a rat who owes me $320 bux. I was supposed to get paid last Fri. Then he told me he was waiting on some checks to clear and he would pay me Tues (yesterday.) But he cancelled work on Tues, so I expected to get paid today, Wed. When I asked him about my check, he got uber offended and said, "I'll pay you when I get paid by my clients. If the checks didn't clear, then I can't pay you. End of story." This fucking dickhead piece of redneck lying shit owes me a bunch of money for work I did. He is a lying cunt anyhow, telling me he's 26 yrs old when I found out he's ONLY 21!!! WTF?!?! If I don't get my check in full first thing Monday morning, I am filing a police report! Why God, WHY?!? Why me? Why this shit to ME?!? I had what I thought was an excellent job making $17 an hour. But little by little I began getting weird vibes about him, especially when he didn't have my check cut for me. Uggggh. I need peace. I need love. I need comfort. I haven't had any real comfort or love in eight yrs now. I'm just so sick & tired of being lonely & fucked up in the head all the time. I never feel "at ease" or a "part of." Even at AA mtg, church, in groups of ppl. I feel like everyone else I'm friends with, was given an instruction guide for life when they were born, except me. I'm just constantly confused & discontent. Ill at ease. Self-will run riot. HELP! HELP! Somebody?